Food Joke Collectors Pillows

'YAY! PATE!'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"States of tofu"

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

Bangers and Mash

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

"Charles didn't like tofu."

Slices of bread rescuing burnt toast.

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

Man takes picutre of other man holding up huge worm at Bait Shop.

Deliboys

"My guess it's guacamole."

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"

Sisyphus Sawyer

"I'll have the vegetable lasagne, hold the vegetables."

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

'That's it gentlemen, we're broke. Anybody know any good jokes?'

'Your car's ready, but drive carefully for awhile. I had to give the student an 'F' for the work he did on it.'

"It's choux pastry, not shoe pastry!"

"The chef made some substitutions to tonight's menu. Instead of Escarots a la Bourguignonne, he's cooking hot dogs."

'What a gyp! Yesterday, after I got fixed, I put my testicles under my pillow, and all I got was a quarter!'

'It's beans OR toast, not beans ON toast.'

Preserved

"That's just great! Enough with the public displays of affection!"

"That's a toaster. It's a tanning bed for bread."

Chicken Road Crossing

"Hallelujah!"

Stay at home food pyramid

'I made your favorite -- dinosaurkraut!'

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

'Not yet! Wait until he hits the breaking point... we just gave him some warm, soft bread and the cold, hard butter... THEN we bring out the flimsy plastic knife.'