Food Industry Fan Gifts

'You're fried!'

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Counting ribs

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

Freshest ice cream in town!

"We won!"

Before/After

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Party time.

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

"Your meal sounded nice."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

You're the sizzle in my roast!

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

Thermidor Dali

Dad's old fashioned barbeque

"Is the garbage fresh?"

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"The special is… pine nut encrusted… filet of salmon… in a balsamic wine reduction."

A convenient attack of swine flu...

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

'Are you sure these sprouts aren't GM?.'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

"He'd like the broiled monkfish, too, but first he's having a quick taste of the gutter."