Food Fan Gifts

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Counting ribs

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

Freshest ice cream in town!

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

Before/After

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

'It's supposed to look and smell greasy.'

"Is the garbage fresh?"

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

'Bunfight at the O.K corral.'

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

Mitch Lee, kung-fondue master.

Vegetables VS Junk Food.

'Real hungry? Should be, 'Really hungry.' Adjectives take adverbs.'

This must be the address where Joe and Maureen are throwing the dinner party!

"What are we doing for Cinco de Mayo this year?"

Bedside Manna.

'Three, two, one. Stand clear.'

Cutlery store: Big Sale! Everything slashed!

Cook spills food and has to open a can (tin).

'Pardon me, M'sieur -- Did you order 'grilled cheese' or 'chilled grease'?'

'The Gingerbread man meets the Frozen Waffler.'

'This is quite common. You've eaten so many sausages that you've turned into one.'