Food & Drink Gifts

"Quick! Nip to 't chippy and don't forget the mushy peas!"

'I sent out for everything.'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Counting ribs

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

Any time is cake o'clock

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

Ice Cream Surgeon

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

What the Doctor Ordered

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

'How can we solve this problem by eating?'

"Where do we put Desserts?"

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

La Table

Fast food. Even faster food

Soup of the month.

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

You're the puff in my pastry!

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'