Food Decision Juggler T-Shirts

'Right, I'm at the yoghurt section...What size?...Right...What flavour?...Right...Low fat?...Right...Very low fat?...Right...How many?...Right...'

Heart Disease Menu

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

'Not yet! Wait until he hits the breaking point... we just gave him some warm, soft bread and the cold, hard butter... THEN we bring out the flimsy plastic knife.'

"You didn't say 'excellent choice' when I ordered! What did I do wrong?"

"It may not be the lowest cal, but it's low enough cal for me."

"Relax sir, I'm sure chef barely remembers you posting a negative review online."

"Stop playing with your food and eat your dinner!"

'It looks like you need to eat a more balanced diet!'

"If this food is healthy, then what about the rest of the store?"

'What do you sugget for a couple of fuddyduddies who love hot and spicy, but have to eat bland?'

'Let's get some lunch in here. I don't trust my gut instincts on an empty stomach.'

"Look! Now they offer healthy choices we can glance at before ordering our usual junk."

'What's this about the food tasting funny?'

"Can I overwhelm you with a menu?"

'So what's it to be, Indian cuisine, Chinese take out or are you going to do the usual Russian Roulette?'

"Give me the menus—you've kept the chef in suspense long enough."

"OMG! I've bought wine instead of milk...again!"

"The diet section is located next to the snack bar."

'I'm concerned about your cholesterol level.'

Innovate - man boobs and gut bra.

Vending machines labeled 'SNACKS' and 'STATINS.'

This fly is doing the backstroke

"I shouldn't, but I'm going to have the garbage."

Restaurant deciding whether to cater or not to cater.

"He'll have the meat loaf"

"The chef's speciality, sir? Well, he's a dab hand at juggling with meat balls and as for fish fingers..."

'I'm semi-bulimic, I binge but I don't purge.'

Why George finds it hard to lose weight.

"I couldn't decide what to cook for dinner, so I didn't cook anything."

OMG, make up your mind! You just signed in, are you sure you want to sigh out again?

'I'm thinking! I'm thinking!'

"Careful what you wish for."

'See? Nobody wants to make a commitment anymore!' (Sign says 'Stop - or whatever')

"Fish? Chicken? Beef? Then, chocolate it is!"