Folk Medicine Believer Gifts

Super-Tia makes Mal de Ojo undo its curse!

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

New Age Store.

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

"This tea isn't helping – I'm taking a gummy."

'Interesting presentation Bradley, except you were supposed to be discussing the nature of the DOW.'

"I'm sensing a nostalgia for when your mother rubbed butter on them."

'2 chocolate truffles in the morning and 2 in the evening should cure your broken heart,,,'

'This is wonderful. It will help millions of people.'

Acupuncture - "So two hundred needles stuck into my fags will help me quit smoking, will it?"

An unlicensed acupuncturist

'And just where did you study medicine?'

"The doctor says your injury is not serious...we're going home."

"Here, let me put some ointment on your bug bite. I made it myself from cayenne powder, licorice root and mugwort leaves blended with that vanilla pudding I made last week. Hmm...it's not here."

'Hey, good news, we had a look at the X-rays. Turns out, God is on your side.'

"The pharmacist will be with you shortly to answer any questions that you have."

'This prescription will stimulate your funny bone which will cause you to laugh. We both know that laughter is the best medicine.'

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

'Can you keep a secret? This particular remedy is illegal in 49 states.'

"She attended the Tia Carmen medical school."

'Talk about temperamental. All I did was suggest he try vinegar and brown paper.'

'Oh, poor thing. You've got a really high temperature!'

'It's hop,hop,skip,rattle,rattle. Remember, the second rattle is the difference between curing jungle fever or just relieving the patient of uncomfortable gas.'

"This is wonderful. It will help millions of people."

Porcupine Acupuncture

Folk wisdom of the galaxies

'There is nothing better for a cold in the head; it's worth gold!'

"I enjoy the pearls of folksy wisdom as much as the next guy, but what, exactly, does he do around here?"

"This could only be the work of...mal de ojo!"

'Turns out it was starve a cold, feed a fever.'

'You and your 'an apple a day keeps eviction away'...'

Faith Healer next to the Emergency Room at a fair.

Lionel had a lazy eye.