Flu Faker Gifts

"I don't feel like going to school. Isn't that a flu-like symptom?"

They hated me.

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

'It's the only known prevention for swine flu...Big bad wolf serum...'

Vaccine

Flu vaccine.

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

"Polly wants a flu shot."

Flu Vaccine.

Pick one: ounce of prevention or pound of cure.

"This feels so familiar."

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

'Can't come in to work today. I'm in bed with a nasty bug.'

Trick or Treatment.

"And the best feature of this shoe is you'll look Athletic even if you're not."

"Apparently Harry is gone viral!"

'I pretended to be religious to get a place at this convent.'

"Rest assured we invest your money as if it were our own. Can I borrow 50 bucks?"

'Quick, shut the door! The flu!'

"Here comes someone now. If we're lucky they haven't had their fly shot, or won't wash their hands!"

"That's what I thought at first, too, but it turns out you have a case of bird flu!"

Air catarrh.

"Each time someone enters this house, they'll be doused in antibacterial soap. It's just during the flu season."

'You don't want to eat me. I have Bird Flu.'

'Last week's sermon was supposed to be about Plagues, but I got the flu.'

"Aren't those dead flowers fake?"

"I'll have the chicken Tamiflu."

"You'll go places in this company. Not really, but with our green screen, we can make it look that way."

"You have a common cold. Here's a prescription for chicken soup from the deli next door."

"It's the same every winter - another epidemic of norovirus stories."

"Honey, we need to get vaccinated! The flu forecaster says another storm is coming!"

"I think the Church is taking this flu thing a little too seriously."

'My elbow has a cold!'