Florida Fanatic Pillows

'Lady Godiva won't be riding today -- she went to Florida for Spring Break.'

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

Florida - Still Gay as F**k

Friday

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

Alternative fielding positions

Science fiction fans on other planets

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

The Games Man: He spends many hours studying minute aquatic flies...which his trout very rarely eat.

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

"Can we get a bigger pool to accommodate all my floats?"

"You're not a real fan. You're just dressed up like a slut for attention."

'Food fight!'

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

Frosty, the Golden Years

Helicopter

'Stop! Don't try to move him until we get his insurance information!'

"Is this Haiku poopery?"

A gondolier walks into the ocean wearing a gondola shaped float.

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

'Well, shoot. Now Uncle Hector's caught in the ice! It's enough to make you want to move to Florida.'

'He has really taken to the training.'

"Chills, Randy. I feel chills. And I can't move." "And I can't remember the last time my palms were this sweaty." "This must've been what people felt like when they heard the Allies were finally invading Normandy on D-Day." "No way any movie can live up to this hype." "Wolverine day is almost upon us." "We are about to embark upon the great crusade..."

'What do you mean I have to buy both of them?! What kind of a business are you running?'

Ref shows footballer green card.

Striker Aims for the Wrong Goal

'Not funny, Lulu!'

"As fans we are smart enough to understand the game, but not smart enough to realize how unimportant it really is."

"I want you to meet these guys-they've got the hottest new stupid thing on the Internet."

"Do you think my followers will mind of 'Martin's Theory of Everything' ends after just three installments?"