Flirty Regal Gifts

"I have to admit. You talked a good game."

Jack Gleeson

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

"No, wait a minute. I'm King. You're Rex."

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

"King and clown—why can't I be both?"

Henry, sire, do you think having you're wife's name tattooed on your chest is a good idea?

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

Emperor Trump and Sultan Erdogan

' Look Philip. Even after fifty years I can still get into my coronation dress.'

'Go on then.....Rule!'

"Her Ladyship wanted the portrait to have a more contemporary look."

Prince

'The chef says the closest thing he has to 'four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie' is quiche.'

Tree's tree nursery. I can redesign your yard. We specialize in eco-friendly landscapes. AS long as it looks like Versailles. French chateaus aren't usually considered natural landscaping. Their lawns are super green. We prefer using native plants and reducing lawns. But I want it to look regal. No problem. We call it "eco-pretentious." Tres Bien!

"We met when I needed a frog to dissect an biology class."

'And he thinks he's the most powerful being in the land.'

'Sorry about the economy, but I never was very good at story problems.'

'What's all this I've been hearing about 'future deficits'?'

"Do you have anything fit for a King?"

A king returns to his throne to find his dog sitting on it wearing his crown.

'They're called 'ladies in waiting,' not 'those broads downstairs'!'

The Queen's Collies.

"Tell the messenger I'm almost done with my sext."

"So, order in or go out?"

"It's still the red-carpet treatment, even if it's only remnants."

'Because the seniority system is traditional, that's why!'

'When others are around, I'm Henry V ... not Hank.'

"Things have been quiet for some time in your line of work."

"The monarch appreciates your wit, but thinks your timing sucks."

'Some other king called while you were out -- he said it was important.'

Now let me see.

Queen

King has long walk to castle.