Flatmate Finder Pillows

I don't know about you, but I find it impossible to find flatmates...

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"I hope he has skeletons in his closet."

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

'Ready Mum?'

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"The first day of school. Yes sir. A day to make new friends. A day to mark new beginnings. A day to discover everyone but you has grown three feet over the summer."

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

So...this is the roommate. Awkward...

"I don't remember him or the meal or what movie we saw. All I remember is I wore the right jeans."

"How do you know it's my leaves clogging the shower drain?"

Hot New Talk Shows!

Room-mate Homicides Waiting to Happen. . .

"On the internet nobody knows you're a dog, but in person..."

"It all happened so fast. I met him online three years ago."

'I guess the transplant went ok - I just got a love letter from my new liver!'

'I'm in trouble now, I told this cute little terrier that I was a pedigree and now she wants to see my kennel club papers'

'...And preferably someone with a blood donor card.'

"We met online, it was love at first site."

"Hey! Your ad said 'non-smoker!"

COMPUTER DATING SERVICE, 'I'm not sure we have a girl with THAT good a sense of humor.'

"Your profile says you're a lumberjack, I though they were all big buggers."

"I'm looking for a long-distance relationship."

'Here we've both been, breaking our necks to meet the right person, and BAM!'

Computer dating.

"Ha ha, I guess my photo on the dating site may have been a little misleading."

"And you're sure this is a recent photo?"

"I have to admit you look a lot different in person."

Chaplain Speedo: speed dating, express marriage, quick counseling, overnight divorce. Drive Thru.

'For a romantic anniversary I thought we'd go back to where we first met.'

"I've been thinking about what you said about three living as cheaply as two"

'You look exactly like your website.'

Phone Dating: Man imagines a gorgeous girl while woman thinks of a handsome man.