Fix-it Sensei Pillows

"Remedial Karate"

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

"What colour do you have to get before the big kids leave you alone?"

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

Tool Box

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

"You need to take this thingamajig...and attach it to the whatchamacallit using a turny thing."

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

'Seriously!? ... Well it's apparent I didn't marry a handyman.'

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

'Well, that's fixed that.'

'She seems to think I only have one thing on my mind.'

Is this for wiping greasy hands?

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

Timber preservation

"Dad! The bathroom pipes are clogged up!"

Bob’s Museum

'I think you want Phillips. Two doors down on the left.'

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

'Certainly. Here's the break-down. Seventy-five dollars for my labour. And seventy-five dollars for you impersonating a plumber.'

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

"Was it a fuse?"

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

'Why did you get a huge socket wrench set? You never use socket wrenches.'

'I think I found the problem.'

"I'm looking for a Father's Day gift. What kind of wrench says 'I love you'?"

Organized chaos.

'Anything need fix'n around here? I mean besides the lamp I just broke.'

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

'Vice squad - you're busted.'