Fitness Novice Gifts

Get washboard abs!

'Don't you know that less packaging creates more waist?'

"Oh, man, I forgot to stretch, ever."

Lazy man reading a fitness book.

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

"First time pruning?"

Be Healthy

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

Man using exercise bike being chased by dog

Running

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"It seemed like miles to me!"

"We hang like this for the incredible ab workout."

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

"Right now Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing sit-ups."

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

"My diet plan for you is if it tastes good, spit it out."

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

Dog stretching before a walk.

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."