First Year Of Marriage Gifts

"Yes dear, I know lots of people have a second honeymoon. But we only got back from our first one last week."

'I bet your Sunday mornings are different now you're married,eh Sam?'

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"They grow up so fast."

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

'Do you think we can cuddle?'

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"I don't want to fork. I just want to spoon."

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

Frog to frog: 'Do you promise to love me warts and all?'

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

"NOW can I shoot you out of a cannon?"

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

Albert & Myra - The End Story

"Look! I'm going to be a customer!"

'The problem is, she's so damn crabby.'

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

Understanding The Other Side, Whether Men, Women, or Mice.