First-time Home Buyers Gifts

'How much?! You can't be serious: It's a hole in a tree!'

House Prices

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

Jack and Ina build their dream house.

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

"Well, we're down to bare brick, natural wood, and raw nerves."

"Son, one day two hundred square feet of this city could be yours to rent."

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

"Yes, we’d like to buy a grow house." "Chia Pet’s first purchase."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

"Mom, could we stay in my old room until we're able to afford a place of our own?"

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

"To be honest, I'd be stupid not to take advantage of the market."

House hunting is cruel.

'New in town, hey? Let me show you a great condo tower.'

"It's a great Fixer-Upper and this is Ken, single, available and a pretty decent handyman."

Starter Homes

'They're playing house.'

'We're starting to build our own house. How much is this two by four?'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

'Floodplain close - House on stilts with ladder. Estate Agent saying, 'Welcome onto the property ladder...''

"This looks intersting. Three bedrooms, two and a half scratching posts..."

"This neighborhood has a strong sense of community that borders on siege mentality."

"I'm going to look for a mortgage...I may be some time!"

"It's times like this I wish I was ore than just an armchair plumber."

New Eco Towns - 'The architects thought we said 'ego'.'

"This room is always bathed in the most beautiful sunlight. Except at night of course."

'If you don't want a lot of column upkeep, this probably isn't a good real estate market for you.'

'Buy this house sir, and you could be a star in a DIY make-over programme!'

"Your dream of a house with a white picket fence is still feasible, at least for the picket fence."

"Call off the siege. It's being converted into ninety-three units of coöperative housing."

Mortgage up: 'Where?.'

'How can our light bill be so big? We see in the dark.'