'Hi, this is Wilbur Gurkenman, your real estate agent! I've found a single room apartment I think you can afford...'
First-time Buyer Bandit Gifts
Looking for a gift that captures that initial thrill of discovery? Our collection celebrates first-time buyers with witty, fun, and unique products that make every purchase feel like an exciting new find. Perfect for those who love to explore and enjoy the thrill of starting something new, our items add a touch of humor and personality to every unboxing moment.
'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'
Fishermen dread the spot where the lures hang heavy from the trees like Spanish moss.
Fish talking about fisherman
White Collar Crime.
Shore fishing requires threading the needle.
"Yes, we’d like to buy a grow house." "Chia Pet’s first purchase."
Book Thief in True Crime Department
"Don't do it - they're trying to beat us at our own game."
'They said before they start biting do we practice catch and release?'
'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'
'Hey, you little punks wouldn't be trying to swamp me, would you?'
'I don't like it... It's too quiet.'
'We're starting to build our own house. How much is this two by four?'
'How much?! You can't be serious: It's a hole in a tree!'
The Specimen Hunter
"Let it go. I was thinking of taking early retirement anyway."
'Don't worry about your daughter Sir: I'll find us a dump to live in...'
"I've got a lot of stuff, a ton of coupons, and I pay by check, so all you behind me...get comfortable!"
4 pm MEET THE COPYCAT AUTHOR
'Hey, this is nice! You should see my starter cave!'
'You're on the very bottom of the 'property ladder'. Or as we estate agents call it; 'the food chain'.'
Man completely bandaged leaves an eye uncovered so he can read.
Plagiarism
Fisher being dragged along by catch.
Carole Jean's First "Big Girl" Heels
"It's got a great view!"
Round-the-world cyclist has world stolen
Man fishing out of another man's fishing box.
'I know it's tough starting out. Your father and I started out in a plastic bag.'
'Inflation allows you to live in a more expensive neighbourhood without even moving.'
"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."
"... And how long have you had this irrational fear that you'll never get a mortgage?"
"Is it me or is this mini home trend getting out of control?"
'Yes, we do sell affordable homes, if you happen to be Donald Trump.'
First-time Buyer Bandit Gifts Collection
First-time Buyer Bandit Mugs
Explore more mugs designed for first-time buyers—witty, fun, and perfect for starting their new journey with a smile.
First-time Buyer Bandit Pillows
Find the perfect pillow for first-time buyers—humorous and comfy, they add a playful touch to any room.
First-time Buyer Bandit Prints
Browse our prints for first-timers—quirky designs that celebrate new beginnings in style.
First-time Buyer Bandit T-Shirts
Check out our t-shirt collection for first-time buyers—hilarious designs that make their new adventure even more memorable.