Firewood Fanatic T-Shirts

"OPEC tighten the screws. the Larned A. Corys are ready."

"I didn't go to work today. I gathered firewood instead."

"It's a great invention, but what if it leads to UTILITY BILLS?"

'The cold winter creates new business.'

D.I.Y

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'Yes, the treestand's maximum weight capacity is 300 pounds, you weigh 301 pounds.'

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

Relaxing in front of a fire.

'Your father's a genius kids. First he discovered fire and now marshmallows.'

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

"If history has taught us anything, it's taught us that there have been a ridiculous number of books written about history."

Energy Conservation Be Damned. Fred constantly prepared for Global Warming and Nuclear Winter to happen at the same time.

The man who discovered smoke

'No matter where the deer are they will be able to hear this grunt.'

'Was it the beaver dream again?'

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

Scotland Yard - coal heavers singing in a public house

The Biggest Forest Fire Starter

"Richard P. Ruggles—a man and his mantelpiece."

"You've been overdoing the tree hugging."

Two Cats 'I just love curling up without a good book.'

"It just doesn't crackle like the one on Netflix."

The sound of a crackling fire licking at seasoned logs...

'Look, fire is fire - Why try to develop theories about it?'

"The house needs to have comfortable window ledges. Lots of windows! And a fireplace!"

Dragon fireplace

Smiley

An snail shell with a chimney

The best apartment at The Maypole

Dog with chew toy.