Fireside Storyteller Gifts

The clock-side in the chimney-corner

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

Support Group for a Good Problem

True confessions.

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

A vampire in a canoe.

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"No, son, you’re not ‘M for Mature.’"

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

Children's Party

Camping.

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

'Dad! Dad! Dad!!. . . We lost our signal.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

'One of the first rules, kids, be sure to watch where you step.'

'Riley, I think it's time you learned the truth... You're adopted.'

"...and those are my deepest, most intimate feelings about our friendship."

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

Father Christmas Painting Robins.

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

"I was hoping summer camp would be more ... campy."

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'