Fire Safety Buff Gifts

"I thought that open-hearth furnace was a little too open."

'Hello, can you check, I may have left my blow torch on.'

Acme Candles - In case of fire, break glass.

'I know the fire's in the kitchen, but that program just irks the hell out of me.'

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"The crew are all on tea-break at the moment. Try and keep the fire going until we can get there."

"Why do you always wear pants?"

"Did we switch everything off before we left?"

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"Smokey The Tree"

The New Normal

"We'll get there when we get there!"

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

"Remember, when you back up, make that 'beep beep' sound."

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

"These are the environmentalists who set the Amazon forest on fire!"

Fire door.

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'

The Cause of the Australian Bushfires

Wall Street...

'It was an exciting party, especially when the firemen came to put out the fire!'

'The casserole didn't make it.'

"We can't wake her, she's sleepwalking."

Forest rangers prevent forest fires

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

Echo Mountain...NO Yodeling! - Falling rock zone.

Mash-Test Dummies.

Scarecrow jumps out of a birthday cake and then catches on fire.

"Warning! Not to be used as a life saving device."