Fire Safety Freak Gifts

"OMG, Stuart! Are you trying to set the house on fire?!"

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"Smokey The Tree"

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

The New Normal

"Oh we're fine, my husbands just learning to cook during the quarantine."

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

Fire door.

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

The Cause of the Australian Bushfires

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

'It was an exciting party, especially when the firemen came to put out the fire!'

Forest rangers prevent forest fires

California fires and Coronavirus

"We can't wake her, she's sleepwalking."

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

The man who discovered smoke

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

'The casserole didn't make it.'

Santa hosing the Chimney.

Forest Management

'If you insist on doing the barbeque,I insist on alerting the Fire Brigade !'

Smokey Bear crying because of deliberately started forest fires

'I know the fire's in the kitchen, but that program just irks the hell out of me.'

'I did give your brother a job - he's keeping an eye out for forest fires.'

"I've invented the fire extinguisher."

"Hold on! Baxter's trying to tell us something..." "The kitchen is on fire"