Financial Strategy Guru Gifts

Bundles of cash in a domino effect.

'It's going to be one of those days.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

The president's men

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

'Progress of a bookshelf'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

"Gentlemen, we're missing a great opportunity by not hitching this company to the current tailspin."

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'If you're so smart, why don't you have some Index Funds in your portfolio?'

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"The economy always seems to be recovering, but it never recovers."

The best financial decision I ever made.

"Hoskins, try saying 'profits are up' without the finger quotes, okay?"

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

The economy.

E.U. Banking Union.

"We need to change, but WHEN?"

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'