Financial Strategy Aficionado Gifts

It's 10 pm. Do you know where your tax loopholes are?

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

"What's a debenture?"

"Gentlemen, we're missing a great opportunity by not hitching this company to the current tailspin."

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

"In the event of an actual S.E.C. investigation, legal representation will drop from the ceiling."

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'

'My husband is very sensitive. He cries when he sees sunsets, old romantic films, and falling values of his 401(k)'

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

Warning that Inflationary Policies Could Lead to Crash on Wall St

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

Stock market investment advice

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

'A short economics test - if you bought something for

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

'The recession is over, again.'

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

I love it when you speak Wall Streetese. Say 'to the upside' for me.