Financial Fitness Enthusiast Gifts

'My personal trainer to help me get through the audit.'

No more obesity - thanks to the stock market!

"I always save the worst for last. After the prostate exam, I'll be checking your credit score."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

In the Guru District

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

Profit

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

Today we'll see some misused or misunderstood financial and economic terms. It's said inflation can hurt the economy. But it's absolutely in the tire business. I bought this warm puffy jacket with cash. A down payment. We like beer and coffee. Our most valuable liquid assets. In a monopoly breakup, the race car would to go one person and the dog to another. And when I become either a buyer or a seller. He's shorting the market!

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

'My feet are killing me.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"Portrait of a Lady"

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

'We're under capitalized. As soon as we reach the break even point we'll buy a lemon.'

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

'Well, well, well...'

Be Healthy

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

Muscles

Turn, turn and turn.

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

'Every piece of equipment is hooked up to battery cells in the basement, and we actually sell electricity back to the power company!'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

'Not that sort of body building program!'