Financial Clown Pillows

"FINAL demand'. Does that mean they have given up asking?

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"I believe we've found the weakest link."

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

A Copy Editor and His Dog

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

Shake it all about sign on desk

How are you at decision making?

"It's the new simplified tax demand from HMRC. . . Three Questions - How much did you earn last year? How much have you got left? And how soon can you send it. . .?"

'I know my resume makes me seem overtrained, but I really wasn't paying attention.'

"How can you have a meteoric rise to the top in a one-story building?"

"This your resumé?" "Yes, it's a list of things I hope you never ask me to do."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

'Careful, that's where the boss keeps his ego.'

Brainstorm in progress.

'Kimble, I'm going to give you a chance at purchasing - nip over to the cafe and get me a cheese and pickle sandwich.'

"First the good news - one of us hasn't been made redundant."

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'Dear, you know how I hate it when you bring your work home.'

'How come, unlike some other bosses, you never surprise me with little promotions?'

'Maybe you should reconsider those place cards, Ms Harris?' (Negotiation talks/Good Guys/Bad Guys)

There now, that wasn't too difficult was it!

'Instead of jail time, our head of finance chose the stock option.'

"Josh, can you call my 3:30 and let them know I'll be a little late and completely unfocused."

'Harold is the brains behind the Smudge-o-Rama mailer.'

"Have I complimented you on marketing's renewed team spirit?"

White Collar Crime.

'Mr. Hickey really knows how to keep our stockholders meetings short and sweet!'

Pecking order.