Filmmakers Gifts

"Tell you the truth - I ain't feelin' all that Hitchcockian."

Janet Leigh

An early turning-point in old Hollywood...

'I guess our fifteen minutes are up.'

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

James Bond in a Snow Globe

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

Director/Action Man toy.

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

Herman Mankiewicz

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

'Take a few days off. Suck some necks ...'

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

'This should be perfect. The main characters fall in love during a series of explosions.'

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka

Stand-up Romcom

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

'This will be great for chase scenes.'

Steve McQueen

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'