Film Purist T-Shirts

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Getting to Know You

"Spoiler alert."

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

Technology and literature

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

'No, when something blows up it doesn't buffer, that's just special effects.'

'What do you mean, 'pass the remote control'?... We're at the cinema!'

Quentin Tarantino

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

'What was the first music they ever said 'this isn't even music' about?'

Pub. This is John. He also loves obscure bands until they're popular then hates them. The Druidiots. Luckies. 50 ale.

Oscars 2024

"It's people like you who are ruining rock and roll for the rest of us."

Giving an Oscar to an animal actor would put the academy awards into context.

Infection Control Center. Now Hiring. I should have said "I'm not afraid of hard work" rather than "I don't mind getting my hands dirty."

"Respect the park's Natural beauty. No Instagram filters."

'I can't find the words to express my anger with you.' - 'She needs a dictionary.'

Casting Director

'I don't mind playing dead. But what I would really like to do is direct.'

Woody Allen

Ernie is a documentary filmmaker who tells stories of folks in their professional lives -- I think he should wonk on his film titles more. One film looked at the surprisingly competitive cutthroat world of the dry cleaning business. "The Hanger Games." In another, we see astronomers traveling to remote locations to escape light pollution. "The Dark Night." Ernie showed us the bond among young butchers in an increasingly vegan world. "Stand by Meat"! And he told us the story of a man who i

'Damn ! I don't have a clue where we are.'

"Gracie, if we want to see more Latinos in film, we need to support Latino films. When a movie comes out with Latino stars and Latino story, we need to go see it."

"But only during rehearsal."

'Cosa vuol significare 'Spaghetti Western'?'

"My lawyer doesn't trust my agent who doesn't trust the director who doesn't trust the screenwriter who doesn't trust me. All perfectly normal."

'Hey! - why bicker all evening when we could be watching a film about ideological genocide.'

Titanic 100th anniversary