Fight Night Spectator Gifts

'I hope it's a quick knockout, I'm double parked.'

"I AM at my usual position."

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

"Cat park"

"Whaddaya say we head home and curl up in front of a nice warm football game?"

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

Mayo-A-Mayo

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

'Why is laying around watching movies considered cozy, but laying around watching football is considered lazy?'

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

"Whoa. Check it out, Doug. Your ex-wife is sitting right below us with that dolt she ran off with..."

'That was a peach of a right hander the referee gave you!'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

'Don't forget the plan - When he gets weak from laughing - Hit him with your left!'

"The first rule of mime club is: You don’t talk about mime club."

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

I think you just paid £5000 for cricket box, not a box at the cricket.

'Work the jab! Move your feet! Attack, attack, attack! ...But be careful. He's got a human shield.'

'What did I tell you about getting caught on the ropes?'

Jason's fighting style was heavily influenced by his love of West Side Story.

Wrestling Champion.

Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the Wood

Octopus in the bleachers.

I told you you weren't allowed to stretch before the seventh inning. Security.

'Break a leg.' - 'Thanks a lot.'

'Soon as your endorphins kick in, you'll feel great.'

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

Fighting Gondoliers.

'Try hitting him harder.' 'Is that all you have to say?' 'Try hitting him harder, PLEASE.'

"Hey Ref - any chance you can get those buzzards to quit circling over my fighter?"

'. . . 36, 37, 38, 39. . .'