Fiery Personality Appreciator Pillows

'We've got a problem - They're starting to enjoy it.'

Donald Trump Playing Golf With Hair On Fire

Wagging Dog

Jarvis Cocker

"Why can't we just have a normal home security system like the neighbours."

Countess

"What a coincidence! I enjoy sleeping and running around the house for no reason, too."

'She'd put 'The fear of God' into God himself!'

William Tell in his younger years.

'And remember, lady, down here the toilet seat stays up!'

'Please tell me you aren't my roommate.'

"It's not a sexual thing - I just enjoy dressing up in sheep's clothing."

Whatever

Will hell freeze over?

'Oh yeah. . . she's the one that has a great personality.'

Edward Scissorhands.

"I'll admit, he may be a bit odd, maybe even creepy. But, he is hands down the best bell ringer we've ever had."

"Santa gets away with it because it shakes like a bowl full of jelly, not beer."

"Far out, they're literally playing with fire! No way they can survive as a species if they're so risk prone!"

Angel kicked out of heaven, sent to Hell, on basis of 'creative differences.'

Sign on a shopper: 'Yes actually I do own the pavement'.

Taste buds

'Hey! He's wearing shoes!!'

Pigtail Picture

Beware of Anthropomorphic Dog

"Well, there are cat people and dog people and..."

'Old McAllister is a real crank -- he has a conspiracy theory about Tom Bodett.'

'All of your issues are prickly issues.'

'i don't know why people find me offensive, you tell me, you silly old bad headed twit.'

'This is coming from someone who drinks from a toilet bowl.'

My job does not define me.

'Fight fire with fire is really just a saying...'

"He's a bit OCD with his spaghetti."

'I wish they'd look for a different virus. I'm just too gregarious to be isolated.'

'As opposed to the subtler markings of the female.'