Fiber Fanatic Gifts

"I'm putting you on a high fiber diet. You can start by eating this brochure."

'I can't believe it! My own son wearing synthetic clothing!'

Sawdust.

"I don't need roughage that badly!"

Woman Knitting With Her Feet.

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

'You need more fiber and less cholesterol in your diet. Throw out the eggs you bought and eat the carton they came in.'

'Yes, it is a carrot. You haven't been getting enough fibre.'

'If you want fiber, Madame, I suggest you eat the menu.'

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

A New Product from the McWit Sawmill & Bakery, The Highest Fiber Bread: Half wheat and half Bark.

"Large coffee and three bran muffins...hopefully to go!"

Telephone companies fighting on a 'Fiber optic' cable

"You have bran damage."

'I gave her that ball of yarn...'

'We squeeze in more pulp and suddenly we're health food!'

'I'm putting you on a high-roughage diet - I want you to eat three heads of cabbage before every meal,'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Supermarket anti-flatulence sign

'How's the high fibre diet going, Juan?'

I think my diet is TOO high in fiber.

Man walking and farting.

'Will you pass me the saw please dear.' ( Fibreboard Cereal)

'An Inferiority Complex Carbohydrate.' A loaf of Blunder Bread thinking, 'Sigh ... other breads have more fiber and fewer carbs than I do ... '

'Hi, yourself.'

'You're eating too much roughage.'

It's a new high-fiber cereal for adults. There's a surprise pre-approved credit card in every box!

House of Beans - No Smoking.

'If you can see any candy bars, get the kind with almonds for our fiber requirements.'

'Why don't you ease up on the knitting?'

"It'll be interesting to see what granny ends up with...she ran out of yarn and is using spaghetti!"

"Do you have any knitting patterns for somebody who can only count to five?"

"We may want to review the fibre levels in our diet..."

"I've jumped on the high fiber bandwagon. Luckily it makes frequent stops."

Super Fibre Cereal.