Feet Fixer-upper Gifts

I loved dancing...

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

She - Interpreter - He.

'Now it fits.'

"...And this is the part where he veers off course from the YouTube tutorial."

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

Man hitting a TV and going out of focus himself.

Handyman Christmas tree with Tools.

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

'Your husband started without me, didn't he?'

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

We'll take a carpenter, painter, plumber...

"That's the last time I ask you to fix anything around here!"

"Thanks to our self-driving car, Fred channels all his road rage energy into doing chores around the house!"

Darn you, you stupid hammer!

DIY information - 'Here you are - look it up yourself.'

'He may not be accurate but he's resourceful'

'They had three puppies and four kids before me: It's almost impossible to find a piece of furniture that hasn't been chewed on...'

The Upholstery Consultant

"According to the instructions, if the product is found to be faulty, dispose of it responsibly and purchase another."

"This does NOT count as fixing the leaky faucet, mister!"

"Larry made that chair from a pile of sticks."

'Not only did I fix the leak, but when you run the hot water it plays 'Harlem Nocturne'.'

Moe's Fix-It Shop - No Heroic Measures

"First thing when you get home tonight help me with the refrigerator."

Well paid job

He spends all weekend under the stupid thing, but I don't think he's really fixing anything.

'While we're on the subject, when are you going to do something about those potholes in our driveway at home?'

"Who would you like me to call first, the electrician or the plumber?"

A sudden draft. The moment he first felt comfortable calling himself a plumber.

"Is it really necessary to shout 'Nailed it!' every time you hammer a nail?"