Posture Fixer-upper Gifts

"Don't worry, we'll have you straightened out in no time."

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

She - Interpreter - He.

"...And this is the part where he veers off course from the YouTube tutorial."

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

"It's a major fixer-upper. How's your marriage?"

Man to pets about upside down house: 'I don't care who started it!'

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

Man hitting a TV and going out of focus himself.

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

'Apart from his awful workmanship, my hubby's handy work is fine.'

'Your husband started without me, didn't he?'

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

We'll take a carpenter, painter, plumber...

DIY information - 'Here you are - look it up yourself.'

"Thanks to our self-driving car, Fred channels all his road rage energy into doing chores around the house!"

Darn you, you stupid hammer!

'He may not be accurate but he's resourceful'

"According to the instructions, if the product is found to be faulty, dispose of it responsibly and purchase another."

The Upholstery Consultant

"This does NOT count as fixing the leaky faucet, mister!"

"Larry made that chair from a pile of sticks."

'Not only did I fix the leak, but when you run the hot water it plays 'Harlem Nocturne'.'

Moe's Fix-It Shop - No Heroic Measures

"First thing when you get home tonight help me with the refrigerator."

"There's nothing wrong with your marriage that an extra bathroom and walk-in closet can't solve."

A Tax Auditor Prescribes Treatment For A Doctor's Condition

'Buy this house sir, and you could be a star in a DIY make-over programme!'

Well paid job

DIY Store "I don't know why we come here..."

He spends all weekend under the stupid thing, but I don't think he's really fixing anything.

'While we're on the subject, when are you going to do something about those potholes in our driveway at home?'

"Who would you like me to call first, the electrician or the plumber?"