Fearless Dental Patient Gifts

'This won't hurt a bit...'

'Rinse please.'

'Holy mackerel! No wonder you were screaming so loudly!'

Dentist's Office: 'I know that $3,280 hurt you more than it did me, Dad.'

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"My husband Frank still has all his own teeth...he keeps them in that jar over the fireplace!"

'...Oh yeah? Well I've never heard of the 'denture fairy'.'

Floss Street Vendor

"You always said nothing would ever come between us."

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

The inscription says: 'Whiter teeth; fresher breath.'

'I still have all my own teeth.'

Vernon has a Floss with Death

'Please become a NHS dentist!'

'I'm the good witch, and this is my house - made entirely out of dental care products.'

'This is a song about a man who visited his dentist. 'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGH!' Thank you.'

'What are you doing? We only take the teeth they leave under the pillow.'

"I've never felt better in my life."

"Please point out the problem tooth."

"Wool is O.K. but there's a fortune in dental floss."

'Does your company have a dental plan?'

'Let's see... how many squeezes did that commercial say to put on the brush?'

"We have adult teeth now, and, as such, they demand adult pain."

"If you won't brush or floss could you at least run your tongue over your teeth once in a while?"

Toothbrush Superhero.

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

"Thanks, Doc- you've put me back in business."

"Don't get too excited. Getting a filling does not make you a cyborg."

'I know! He has the worst breath!'

Open Wide The Dentist's View.

"So, you see, what you were really looking for was a deeper connection with your father, and not the dentist's office down the hall."

Dentimony.

'Here are Mister Fernbush's new dentures...his mouth is a bit large, so try not to stare!'

'I like Dr. Keener. He's a good loser.'

'I'm the toothpaste genie offering you a free dental plan!'