Fashionista In Denial Gifts

As his hearing worsened, Larry had to buy louder and louder clothes.

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

"Whatever you do, DON'T go in there! It's the mummy's purse!"

"Everyone who cares about you is here, Frank, because we all feel it's time you quit wearing your baseball cap backwards."

Minimal Chic.

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Middle-Age Superheroes

Shop assistant looking at woman wearing a hideous outfit while her shadow is sick in a bucket.

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

Sue began to wonder if she needed a spending review of her own.

"Wow. I need either new glasses or a new hairdo."

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

Poisson d'Avril!

"I don’t know, honey – sort of makes you look like a blockhead."

'He always said he wouldn't be seen dead with his shirt outside his trousers - he'll be livid.'

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

A sign outside the "Museum of Modern Gift Items" reads "T-shirts of the Masters Sale".

"You do realize you're violating the dress code..."

'I can just make it out. She's saying 'call my hairdresser'.'

"We're thinking of having your nose pierced."

Extremely leggy woman emerges from stretch limo.

"Apparently, he's well over 100 now."

"Now these prescription glasses are popular with our clients who like to be stylish yet lay low."

"I don't want to look ridiculous at the clown convention!"

'I need something to wear to a bankruptcy hearing.'

"I have an interview with a law firm. I hope to make an impression."

"Oh ... still putting on your makeup?"

'Going as a high-thread-count ghost again this year.'

'Philip was cute this morning. He said money's tight and I should only buy what I need.'

"My dad says at some point in your life, fashion isn't important anymore. You basically wear nylon slacks and guayaberas every day."

"What have you got that says, 'not guilty'?"

Coffee cup lids that don't fit properly and then dribble dwon the front of your best outfit just before the big meeting.

'I stay out of the sun and use a fan: That way, I don't need to roll in the mud to keep cool...'

'Gorgeous or gorging, why do I always have to choose?'

Oh no! My trouser rash has flared up again!