Fashion Realist Gifts

Getting older is . . . when you start to dress for comfort rather than style.

Getting older is...When you start to dress for comfort rather than style.

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

'I don't think of my skin as saggy...I think of it as relaxed-fit!'

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

Woman talking romantically whilst man talks about measuring the scullery.

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

"You want to grow a ponytail? OK...as long as it's not from hair growing out of your ears."

"I'm having second thoughts about those damn school uniforms."

Mall of ages

"Will you sign a legally binding contract to get the state involved if you ever decide to leave me?"

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

'No, it's not a special on the Grand Canyon. It's an actor's face in high definition.'

Warning Being Alive On This Planet May Cause Cancer

'I'm going to have to let you go.'

Made It! Without getting one tattoo.

Al, I hear that only one out of 100 art school graduates goes on to make a living in art. That's where I was smart, Axel: I flunked out!

"You didn't iron the crease in my pants!! I'm gonna look ridiculous!!"

"It was love at first sight, but spectacles have improved a lot since then."

"Is that what you're wearing?"

"I don't want an 'outfit'. I just want clothes."

"Listen, Baldo, I know what you're thinking...but as part of the management team, I can say with all confidence that your job is safe."

'Malcolm is unswayed by post-foundationalist trendiness.'

Proverbs for Real Life. When one door closes it's probably locked and your key is on the other side.

Style

"It's no good, Martin, it's still in the room."

'Every Age has its vision of beauty.'

"Derek's sneakers were made in Malaysia. Can anyone show us where Malaysia is?"

Stendhal

'Are you going to keep that silly mustache for all eternity?'

"Well, then, how about staying together for the sake of our joint checking account?"

Second marriage vows.

"Old MacDonald had a farm"