Farming Fans Gifts

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

Tractor

Cow Pinatas

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

Raptures

Yoyo sheep

'...and I only have eyes, for ewe...'

'No, you can't play Space Invaders in it.'

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

Curse my curiosity and four stomachs!

"I know you're a cow, but you're still hogging the covers!"

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"It's a scientific breakthrough! This seed will produce less corn...thus driving up the price!"

Niche Extracurriculars

'It's the cows. They can't get past a cattle guard.'

'That's cow. What do cows say, Jimmy? Cows say moo. Look Jimmy, a chicken.'

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

"I'm an ass is half-full kind of donkey."

Farmacy - 'I can't read your doctor's chicken scratch. I'm sure the pharmacist can, though.'

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

Scotsman Playing Cow Bagpipes.

U.S. Farm Production: Cup Runneth Over.

"One of your delicious ducks got into my yard yesterday."

Free Range Eggs - ""I've decided to sell up. I'm having trouble making hens meet."

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

'Is it true you're covered in genuine pigskin?'

'I got the job, Mom. You always said I'd make a living with my hands.'

Cow Pilot.

So? You snort when you laugh, too.

Hectare?