Farm Fitness Fans Gifts

'STOP DOING SIT-UPS!'

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

Raptures

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

Yoyo sheep

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

'...and I only have eyes, for ewe...'

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

Wild Cow.

"I know you're a cow, but you're still hogging the covers!"

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

'Get right back out there, young man, and track some mud in!'

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"It's a scientific breakthrough! This seed will produce less corn...thus driving up the price!"

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

'George, stop playing with the children.'

"I'm an ass is half-full kind of donkey."

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

'That's cow. What do cows say, Jimmy? Cows say moo. Look Jimmy, a chicken.'

Money Tree

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'