Farm Techie Gifts

"Don't get me wrong I think these new GPS systems will revolutionise ploughing."

'I'm here to fix your robotic milker.'

Okay, dig that one up!

"I'm sorry I bumped you, honey. Hello, tech support, I have a farmer in the Dell!"

'I finnaly located what was causing that hissing sound on the tractor.'

Horse Clean-up

The sheep are much easier to keep track of now. They spend all day watching clips on Ewe Tube!

Old MacDonald had a startup.

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

A chicken coop with a loudspeaker on the roof

'I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message after the peep.'

Farmer using a photo editing program

"The only downside to free-range is I can't get a Wi-Fi signal out here."

This one needs re-booting!

Modern Shepherding

"it has 256 ringtones and I can download more."

'Look at it another way. Think of the money you'll save on tires.'

"I keep forgetting. When do I cluck and when do I double-cluck?"

"I'm on the range, but I'm not home on the range."

Milk Machine

'Fun's over, the farmer installed a corn filter.'

'This injection is a combination of 16 drugs...

I'm texting!

Agriculture and New Technologies

'I'm setting up a ring ID. When my phone 'oinks,' I'll know it's you calling.'

"And, who is this Alice Chalmers that you've started spending money on?"

'I'm not sure why, but you sound muffled.'

Farm wife rings her husband rather than calling out to him to let him know that dinner is ready.

'You were right: There's a needle in this haystack...'

I'm still downloading...

"I never search my health symptoms anymore. It always seems to lead to barbecue."

"Let's skip the whistling. Just mail me on www.comeby.co.uk."

'. . . download the top bales, then upload them into the barn...got it?'

Selfie With A Scarecrow

'I just thought if I got away from the barn, I could have some privacy.'