Farm Funnies Gifts

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

"She's giving me only one egg a month, I think she's getting lazy."

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

'Oh Hi!'

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

'It's your fault. I told you to watch that wet spot.'

The Taming of the Ewe

Cow Wash Cycle.

Testing...Testing...1...2..3...

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

"All good: This egg looks healthy as well..."

'I think you need an electrician here, rather than a veterinarian.'

Christmas Cow.

'Gee, at these prices you'd think they would tie the feedbags on for you.'

'I LOVE YOU GUYS!' 'She's been drinking again!'

'I don't know if she's gonna be much good. I don't think she's even registered.'

'How are the cloning experiments of shepherds going?'

"Sorry, nature calls, I'll be back in five minutes: Suzie, you're in charge..."

Organ Donor Card

Farmer pushes the cow down so he boings back up again.

'I see the Maids have been in!'

"Do you or do you not have any wool, and if so, how many bags full?"

Perhaps it would be easier using mice?

'When we were first married, he was all 'Cock-A-Doodle-Do.' Now, he's just 'Cock-A-Doodle-Don't.''

Cow cleaning his teeth with string.

'Culled?! That's a relief...I thought you said we were gonna be killed!'

"You call it milking, I call it groping."