Farewell Enthusiast Gifts

Sorry you're leaving.

Welcome to the Team

"Damn Pope Gregory and his new calendar."

Teddy Boys' Picnic

'It's too wet for walkies and I can't find my boots!'

Bureau of Missing Persons

Hippie on the moon

Lancelot put to the Test.

'Next time, spring for a little more, and get a GOOD GPS'

"I'm very proud. Someone I've been stalking has been nominated for an Academy Award."

'Stamp auction' WW2 Victory stamps on two fingers

Letter of Resignation

"That's just the meds kicking in."

"Does it come in menthol?"

Death of a Goat Yoga Instructor

'Mom, Dad. . . remember that day you sent me to law school and I got lost?'

"The Good news is that a number of GPs have agreed to take action on a number of dangerous 'lifestyle' issues including high levels of stress, long working hours..."

King George VI

"I can't find my stupid phone, so leave a message..."

Fisherman takes home the mermaid he caught.

He had tried many ways to quit smoking but only one worked.

"Could you access your online dictionary for the definition of 'sayonara'?"

"We're about to go live. Prepare to mourn in 10. . . 9. . . 8. . ."

"Let me try that!"

Top 10 signs you're getting older...

'If I knew exactly where I lost his insulin - it would not be lost - would it!?!'

"Amazing - the event horizon of a black hole!"

"Yeah, it's all grown locally. Just not locally around here."

'No, I didn't start smoking again! That's chimney you smell!'

I'm going to prescribe a nicotine patch. I want you to put it on your forehead so you'll stop thinking of smoking.

'Don't tell me you've lost your umbrella again!'

"Yes, Mom was a junk-yard dog but she was full of love."

Protestor holding sign reading 'Gravitate Locally'.

Personalized Greetings

No Soap in the Bathroom