Fans Of Lighthearted Humor Pillows

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

"Bless You."

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

Raised by Dogs

A Golden Non-Retriever

'Hon, I'm home!'

"Mommy usually reads me a story, then slips me a twenty."

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'If you must know, yes, I do sometimes fake purring.'

"Oh boy, by the way this guy is moving, we can assume he's got some of our friends in his pants..."

"Yes, "breeding like rabbits" is often used in a pejorative sense. The truth is, we don't care as we love having kids..."

"My reflexes are not what they used to be: This is how I catch birds now..."

Clairvoyant - I want to divorce my husband. He's having an affair next week.

One day having a great personality was going to become a crucial evolutionary trait...

"The Loyalty Card program has changed. Management now requires you to get a Loyalty Forehead Tattoo of the bar's logo."

"No Eric, you're NOT funny haha. . . you're funny peculiar. . !"

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"

A better way to sweep the floor.... just shuffle!

Beach Attraction

Yeti/Not Yeti

'You're sexy when your mind is somewhere else.'

A Human balloon being sold to a child balloon.

"And what would you consider your legacy to be, Dr. Fauci, when all of this is behind us?"

Arm puncture...

'You're healthy as an eohippus!'

I slept funny last night!

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, lady, can't you read?"

'Let me put it this way...don't start watching any miniseries on TV.'