Fans Of Funny Quarrels Gifts

'Have you been complaining to the baker about leaving the bread outside?'

'A cheeky red?'

Raised by Dogs

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

'Hon, I'm home!'

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

I thought I was proposing to Sally, but evidently I was challenging her to a twenty year series of debates.

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a bubble like this?"

'If you must know, yes, I do sometimes fake purring.'

"Hang on a tick, lads, what have we here?"

What? I had to fire our flare gun at him before he fired his flare gun at us!

"I'm sorry, Doctor, when you said benign growth, I thought you were referring to my husband."

Clairvoyant - I want to divorce my husband. He's having an affair next week.

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"

A better way to sweep the floor.... just shuffle!

"Why is it that the laws of inevitability always seem higher on ladies day?"

'You're healthy as an eohippus!'

'You're sexy when your mind is somewhere else.'

"Should've let go of the plane when I told you to."

Arm puncture...

"And what would you consider your legacy to be, Dr. Fauci, when all of this is behind us?"

'Today is. . . Tuesday! We are going. . . on a picnic. . . I am. . . an idiot.'

"I try to keep my coffee buzz going till the Martini buzz kicks in."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, lady, can't you read?"

"I'm interested in the debt consolidation package your bank has been advertising...."

'As soon as we exchaged vows we started exchanging barbs.'

"Why am I always the bad guy?"

"You're a plumber, I'm a doctor. Now that I've given you some free medical advice, how about stepping into my kitchen and fixing my leaky faucet?"

'I was hurt in a boating accident. I tripped over a rack of oars at a sporting goods store.'

Boring Bedtime Stories.

'I can remember when this was just ice.'

You must be this tall to bump head on sign.

"Nice shirt. Is it made of boyfriend material?"

Bullroom Dancing.