Fan Of Classic Humor Pillows

Clown at custard pie factory, "Are you sure about hiring him Mr Wilkins?"

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

'Sigh! So that's what love is all about...'

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

'You must have misunderstood, dear -- I'm sure they don't sell old generals at government auctions!'

"It's time you had those dinosaur hips replaced."

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

Moon Line UP

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

Dante Alighieri

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

'The MCC celebrate a famous victory' group of dodgy looking old English men holding drinking glasses

'Now, Mrs Althorpe, if you think you see the man who assaulted you, we just want you to touch him on the shoulder.' (Mrs Althorpe beats a man up and then says she doesn't recognise any of them)

Old Martin Chuzzlewit Suspects the Landlady without Reason

Its a poor heart that never rejoices

'We'll return to the evening news right after this message from the Three Stooges....'

"My great-uncle Lupe owned a barber shop! He made a lot of money!"

"No Eric, you're NOT funny haha. . . you're funny peculiar. . !"

'We've been picking up your radio broadcasts- You must be Fibber McGee and Molly'

"Keep an eye on Old Bound Volume of Harpers. He's on the make."

"Miss, you said that a single rabbit could reproduce a hundred times a year? What about a married rabbit?"

"Is it wrong to be evasive and not answer questions?"

Sisyphus, 117 million years on

1839: Rare photograph of wagons on the 'Organ Trail.'

"I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

"At the last minute, his personal physician always intervenes."

"Knock! Knock! Who's there? What, seriously? You mean you haven't installed personal security cameras?"

Beware Of The Gnome - Look dear how quaint.

"I hope this isn't the start of an insensitive joke that was once considered funny."

Tessa

Jackie Gleason's Old Desk: Trays read: InOutPow, right in the kisser.

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'