Fan Fiction Writer Gifts

The Da Vinci Code Bookstore.

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

"NOW can I shoot you out of a cannon?"

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

'Good work pulling the sword from the stone. Now, how 'bout loosening the lid on the magic pickle jar?'

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

'I suppose you think that's funny.'

Through the Looking Glass - The Lion and the Unicorn Fight

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

Fourth Tableau of Das Rheingold

'I need a sun cream with a very high protection factor.'

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

'I've no time for these foragers - they come into the area and snap up all the best houses...'

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

Hansel and Gretal

A man with Dwarfism is reading Little Women.

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

"It all happened so fast. 'Notable Book of the Year' to the remainder shelves to HERE in just six months!"

Mermaids in love

Frankenstein's Ancestry

"Yes, could you discuss the inspiration for the protagonist? Specifically, the motivations which propel the direction of his narrative?" "I would prefer not to." "Bartleby, the author."

Going Down?

"Take the picture, dam it, take the picture!"

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

"It's a bit of a surprise. He has eaten people before, but only when he felt threatened. Your husband must have provoked him."

"I wish you would actually sell one of these novels...all these returned manuscripts are giving me backaches!"

"First I alienated the apes who'd raised me. Then there was a lot of turmoil with the colonials pulling out. Now Jane and me are semi-retired and I haven't swing through the trees in ages. Want a drink?"

'Well this is awkward.'