Family Therapist In Training Gifts

The Big Book of Parent-Child Fights

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Now, Mrs. Jones, repeat after me..."

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

Therapist School

'Then, after a while, the pitter patter of tiny running shoes.'

"This could be quite boring. No club jumper, no theme song and no pie nights!"

"You need to stop pressing the snooze button on your biological clock."

'We've never had an accident - aside from three of our five kids.'

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."

"I'm afraid your allowance didn't survive the latest round of budget cuts."

"Don't try to blame this mess on your father!"

"They think I don't have a clue."

Interpreters.

'Do you ever communicate as a family by just speaking?'

"Mr. Wickers called me 'gifted' in front of the whole class. I'm ruined."

'The shrink said my holiday was hereditary - my family.'

Ok, the first challenge is to throw out all the cheap crap in the swag bag we just gave you.

A family goes on holiday while a group of strangers inhabits their home.

'Do you ever communicate as a family by just speaking?'

"You're about to discover why I left home at 15."

"?"Psychoanalysis for Dummies"?

Interpreter.

'Jeez, grandmom, here's your problem...you connect to WiFi, not HiFi!'

"Look, we might have our little tiffs, but I think we should stay together for the sake of the children."

Minority Group Access To Assisted Reproduction.

'You couldn't just lock him up somewhere, could you?'

"For better or for worse, from pre-nuptial contract to no-fault divorce..."

"Mom, Dad, this is my therapist, John, whom I've told so much about you."

'It's a done deal...she keeps the cave and the kids...you get the wheels.'

Two people shouting.

'No whey, Jose!'