Family Role Enthusiast Gifts

"I'm having an identity crisis. I can't keep track of whether I'm Nana, Mimi, or Grandma Wolcott."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

No one has ever been accused of choosing bad relatives.

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

'Everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the other.'

I love my family!

"Listen. Nobody's cuter than anyone else! You're all equally cute!"

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

It's a Boy

Lady asking her fiance's son if she can be his new mother.

"I'm so good at this!"

"Use your inside scream."

Mother's Love

"It's bold! It's moving! It's inspired! But what is it?"

'I think babies grow in a mommy's tummy and adopted babies grow in a mommy's heart.'

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

"I think it's time we learned to stand up for our selves."

"Ours will be the first mixed marriage in my family. Dog people NEVER marry cat people."

'They're a very successful family.'

Baby, baby maker

'If your boss is so dumb, daddy, why did he hire you?'

"Do you have to do that even when it's not Valentine's Day?"

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

"Yes, "breeding like rabbits" is often used in a pejorative sense. The truth is, we don't care as we love having kids..."

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

'If he hasn't got a name yet, how do we know he's ours?'

"I read the audio book."

"Well that's the last of our offspring gone - let battle commence."

'Oops! It says administer at bedtime. Guess that makes it bedtime.'

"It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother."

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"