Family Member Who Loves Dogs Gifts

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

"That's where we differ. You'd eat cat food, but I wouldn't touch dog food."

"Don't even think about it."

"Your love gives me strength."

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

"Thank goodness for pet doors because the alarm on my piddle clock was about to ring on the rug."

'It says here: while most dogs are family dogs, some dogs like one family member more. Do you think Fritzi is like that?'

Dog on balconey in city sniffing tree in pot

But it's the other leg that hurts.

'He's never going to graduate. How about giving him an honorary degree instead?'

"I just don't get it, they don't do it themselves, so why do they insist on us sitting before crossing the road?"

"What's that smell, girl? Is it spring?"

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

Dog History

Cat does not want to chase the stick.

'What is it with dogs and the thrill of getting caught?'

"This is Dakota, Bodie and Scout—And our dog, Richard."

"He's anxious to resume perpetrating his usual activities."

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

'You see, Doctor, we've never had any children...

'What does he mean, we're not on the list?'

'Well sure, YOU'VE got brakes on FOUR wheels!'

"You're spoiling that dog!"

'His jaw got stuck when he tried to fetch the Sunday paper!'

When dogs appear to be deep in thought.

"That's impressive, but I asked you to roll over."

"He's so old I usually let him do what he wants."

'You're lucky you can't read.'

"Good dog!"