Family Management Pillows

"My to-do list is somewhere on there."

'Don't you realize, Jason, that when you throw furniture out of the window and tie your sister to a tree, you make Mommy and Daddy very sad.'

"I raised three kids, so you could say I was in risk management."

"I'm an expert in crisis management, I've got three daughters!"

"I don't see how we can carry on without making some major sacrifices. . ."

"Working from home he misses his meetings."

Let's get organized

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

"I have a feeling he understands more than we think."

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

A Day In The Kitchen

"By labeling it, I control it."

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

'When training my son, keep him totally ignorant. I'm grooming him to be VP in-charge-of -denials.'

"I had to skip my workout."

'Your house is spotless, your children are well behaved and dinner was delicious. How do you do it?'

"Sorry, stock-market jitters."

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

Hassled Mother.

"This looks like a job for 'Margarita Man!'"

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

"Let me put on my 'working' head."

'What have I made for dinner? A reservation at the restaurant down the road. . .'

"I'll bet she was worn out by the end of teacher's meeting day."

"Not tonight, Jon. I have to clean for the cleaning lady."

'This home based business is easy to set up. Everyone knows that women are better at multitasking.'

"I can't party like I used to, I've got enough Tupperware"

Parent Involvement Tip #1

Separation Anxiety

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

"How many times have I told you kids to turn off the light when you leave a room?!"

'It wasn't premeditated.