Family Lore Lover Gifts

"This is your great-great-great grandfather Luis. He met your great-great-great-grandmother at the store where she worked. He was there to buy a lawn mower! She sold him a sheep. They hadn't invented law mowers."

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

Vlad the Inhaler

The Loch Ness Rowing Team

"Bigfoot"

Giant using sheep as cotton buds

Wolf to Red Riding Hood: 'No thanks, I'm on a strict grandmother diet.'

"You're ruining our reputation, Bob!"

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

I crawled out of a toilet and ate a guy. Say my name 3 times in a mirror. I dare you. No one suspects I'm Slenderman. She took me home. Then she woke up in a tub of ice missing a kidney. Urban Legends-in-Their-Own-Minds.

"Honey, where's the baby?" "The first voyage of Sinbad"

Buoyed by his past success, William Tell sought even greater challenges,

Wicca Heritage Centre: Hansel and Gretel stayed here.

"Tonight we are going out to plunder, lads!"

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

'Good news from the field, sire! Attila did not like the referee's call, so he's folding up his tents, taking his ball and going home!'

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

"I'm getting too old for this..."

Balding gnomes

"You have to practice because if the Devil challenges you to a fiddle contest and wins, he gets your soul."

'It's time you knew the truth. You're not my real son. You're a novelization.'

"I'm not an intern, I'm a squire. I'm not an intern, I'm a squire..."

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

"Sorry. I'm out of leprecondoms."

"We received another message from that scoundrel Robin Hood, sire!"

"I'm referring you to an old gypsy woman."

Edna spots the ever elusive Loch Ness Monster.

'Well of course there are no snakes, have you not heard of St Patrick, at all, at all?'

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

"Nothing is ever in my size either."

Fairy tales reimagined for the 21st century. Jack and the Beanstalk

Alternative Medicine.