Family Life Advisor Gifts

"Soup should be seen and not heard!"

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

'That reminds me, the seat broke on mine. I must make time to get it repaired.'

'Everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the other.'

celebrating a birth.

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

"It's his emotional support animal."

'With these alternative fertility treatments you never quite know how things turn out,'

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

"Use your inside scream."

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

"I'm so good at this!"

"It's bold! It's moving! It's inspired! But what is it?"

'What about you...you've been living here thirty years too?'

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

George Washington's sister was always getting him into trouble.

'If your boss is so dumb, daddy, why did he hire you?'

'Feel free to get a second opinion. I can give you the number to my mom.'

"Grandmom told me "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach." I told her that has medical malpractice written all over it!"

'Oops! It says administer at bedtime. Guess that makes it bedtime.'

'If he hasn't got a name yet, how do we know he's ours?'

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

"I read the audio book."

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

World's Best Dad. I don't know. I thought they were with you. World's Best Mom.

"Careful George. You don't want to hurt our baby boy."

"I'm in big trouble. The dog ate my homework, and Dad ate my science project."

"If you don't stop doing that, your faces will stick that way!"

'Quit playing kick ball with your brother!'

'I don't like that one. . . how about the one with the cute smile.'

"Mom...There's nothing to do..."

"I've decided to have a kid."

"Let's split up the jobs for taking care of the baby. I'll take care of what goes in to him. . . you take care of what goes out!"

The best time capsules are our children.