Family Dinner Explorer Gifts

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

'Ahhh...'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"The food isn't bad, but I don't care much for the floor show!"

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

Mrs. Robot attempts to improve her family's diet.

"If you really loved me you wouldn't have called me Euthanasia!"

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

Platter confusion.

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"You've all been like a company to me."

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

'As soon as your mother is through laundering the money we'll go out to eat.'

"And that's where hot dogs come from."

"I like to think that each generation will need a little less therapy than the generation before."

The First 3-D Thanksgiving