Family Dining Enthusiast Gifts

"A table for lunch, is that breastfeeding or non breastfeeding?"

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"Sarah has two mommies and both of them are good cooks."

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

'For the first 500 calories of what we are about to receive, make us truly thankful.'

'Aw, mom! How come I always have to eat at the kiddie carcass?'

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

'I'm thankful you didn't make turnips.'

A man and baby wearing bibs

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

'Because Thanksgiving is about a bountiful harvest. That's why we have to eat all these vegetables.'

"You've all been like a company to me."

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

The First 3-D Thanksgiving

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

Non-wall St merger: Mom's Home Cooking...Pop's Cafe!

"If you liked tonight's meal, you might enjoy 'Making The Meal,' a documentary with outtakes and commentary when the cook ran out of eggs because someone put an empty carton back in the refrigerator..."

"Michael, do your dinner."

Ways to Misuse Ventriloquism

"You heard your mother. There's no need to bless the superfoods."

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

'I lost the grocery list you gave me. So I brought home a few weeks supply of pizza.'

Adult Table - Kids Table - Kids' Friends Table

'When I'm rich, I'm going to hire a food taster to check for vegetables.'

"Funny how we never seem to run out of vegetables."

"I remember a simpler time when the Sunday dinner tables were divided up for the adults and kids."

"More aphorisms, please!"

'Just like when YOU cook or mom cooks???'

I've learned that it doesn't do any good to slip broccoli to the dog under the table.

Screen Time at the Dining Table

"Other than being sent to the principal's office, my detention, and three day suspension, school was good."